One good thing about being a freelance ghostwriter is that you get to do research on various topics for books you are writing for clients. During one such research session, I found out that firecrackers are banned in the United States of America.
Especially Cherry Bombs and M-80s, which are considered to be quite dangerous. They produce a deafening blast which can lead to temporary or permanent damage to someone's hearing. They can be used to cause damage to someone's property. And worse of all, if an idiot tries to use them, they can blow his fingers right off his hand.
So this Federal law against these kind of firecrackers is an admirable initiative by the US government against the menace of teenagers playing with firecrackers.
Meanwhile, guns are legal. A 16 year old can't be in the possession of firecrackers but if he has the written permission of his parents, he can have a gun.
Because of these two slightly related laws, there are very few teenagers in America who blow their fingers off with a Cherry Bomb. But there are plenty of teenagers who get shot, shoot their classmates in mass shootings, have gang wars, drive-by shootings, and blow each other's, and sometimes their own, head off.
So my question is:
Am I dead? Be honest. Have I died and gone to some crazy afterlife world? This isn't the real world, right? This can't be the real world. I must be in hell. Right? Please tell me this is hell.